Signature campaign – care to sign?!?

30 Aug

Thumb Impressions seems the perfect remedy to all forgery or cheating problems. It’s one of those things that have lasted centuries and nothing modern has been able to wipe out its sheer simplicity, genius and ease. Signatures, I suppose followed literacy. Kings used it with a flourish to issue an execution order or to go to war or some silly stuff kings used to do. Later judges broke a nib over a judgment. People spent hours over creating their own signatures that none could forge and reflected the personality they wanted to express. There are people who make a living on reading people’s signatures and guessing personality quirks.

Every child reaches a stage when they start developing their signatures and creating one that stands apart and many a page is crumpled to get that perfect signature drafted before making it final.

Unfortunately, forgers slog harder to copy and major frauds and forgeries are committed even of the most complex signatures. Then there is the danger of election rigging where your identity and ideology are in danger with mass rigging and the whole nation’s future depends on being forge proof. And, that’s where I’d say – thumbs down!

I’m all for the good old thumb impression. It’s the perfect solution to all verification and proofs. After all, signatures are easily forged, faces changed with surgery. And, it’s said everybody has more than one double in the world. So, for authenticity’s sake fingerprints seem to be the best bet.

Actually, I do have a vested interest in going all thumbs, though I am a little embarrassed to say this. My signature is so ordinary, without style that I blush every time someone says, not your initials please! And, to top that my oh so simple signature even fluctuates ever so slightly. My bank’s used to this, recognises my (ir)regular sign, and clears my cheques.

The reason I haven’t tried to acquire a stylized signature is I’d probably forget it and that would land me into even more trouble. I’m always amazed at people who sign with such a flourish and with such expressions of their name it almost seems like a work of art. It fascinates me how it’s the same every time. As for me I’m usually in such a hurry and so harried that I feel safer with my ordinary, mousy signature. Plus, with frauds and forgeries and scams all around I’m convinced it’s best for all concerned that we take to the thumbprint way. See the benefits:

No two fingerprints are the same-I’m sure God in all his infinite wisdom and foresight knew human weakness and with the best technology available only to him ensured that all fingerprints are not alike. Until some evil force breaks this code, we are safe!

Then there is the election rigging. This could be easily solved. Indelible ink used for thumb impressions against the party candidate would end rigging forever. Then you can stop gangsters from having two passports. Computers can verify this with their data bank of all fingerprints.

Of course, thumbprints do have that uneducated touch! A little retro could do us some over-technologified people some good. It’s like getting to the grassroots.

I am all set for this anti-signature campaign. Care to sign?

P.S. President Obama’s writing sample in the paper made me so sentimental, I’ve now decided to try my hand at improving my signature and win the campaign!

Leave a Comment


Posted by on August 30, 2011 in fun, Humour, Personal, Uncategorized, Writing


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2 responses to “Signature campaign – care to sign?!?

  1. Anonymous

    January 10, 2012 at 7:24 pm

    Is it that deep Is this even worth a discussion There might be more people out there who would agree with Patton and or are indeed offended.

    • Valsa

      January 16, 2012 at 4:05 pm

      wat was that about?1? huh!!


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